Iron Mike Tyson: Training Worlds Worst Boxer Spoof!

Hilarious Short Spoof with New Boxing Sensation and World Title Challenger with the longest Name ever bestowed on a human being who everybody calls 'Bobby'. Bobby is Speaking of His upcoming fight later that day against The Reigning Champ saying: "I have a good trainer, His name is Michael and I think He used to box a bit Himself...."

Extremely funny spoof comical sketch and I am glad to see Tyson has, after fighting His own inner demons for the longest time, seems to finally have let all that resentment and hate go and today seems a far more at peace Mike Tyson. Anyway. . .

Very funny!! Tyson may be a dick but at least he has a good sense of humor.

Rocketman wrote:Very funny!! Tyson may be a dick but at least he has a good sense of humor.

I'd probably be a dick too if I'd had a wife who married Me only so She could then quickly divorce Me and be legally entitled to half of everything, then another woman accuse Me of rape and which I did not commit but get 7 years inside anyway and upon My release, just when life can't seem to get much worse, there's Don King literally outside the prison gate waiting with open arms to steal a Multi-Million Fortune of My future fight earnings.

I can see why Tyson had so much rage at one point and hate for people and life in general. I'll never forget watching The Lewis vs Tyson Fight and after Lewis Knocked a 36 year old Tyson out Max Kellerman asked Mike what He plans to do now (Kellerman meant in terms of boxing career) and Mike said:

"Man, I don't know. I don't have anywhere to go or anything to do. I don't have anyone that truly cares about Me. I'll probably go back to New York and just go be fly My Pigeons off a roof somewhere alone. That's all I have to do.."

When He said that I genuinely felt for the guy. I think that was Mike's way of acknowledging that the people around Him post prison release were just there to see how much they could make off Mike's celeb or steal directly from Him. He said also another time that He prefers to be with His pigeons that other people saying:

" I let them free to go fly wherever and they go for a while and then they come back. They don't come back cause I have money, they don't come back cause I'm heavyweight Champ of the World Mike Tyson or anything like that. They don't care about that and they come back just because they want to come back."

Most people, casual observers of the sport of boxing, will remember Tyson as an aggressive brutal hard hitting fighter with a street fight mentality who will, if You piss Him off, relieve You of your ears and things like causing mayhem at press conferences by swinging at one of Lewis's Bodyguards before raving to a white reporter "Come up here and say that you faggot! You can't last 5 minutes in My world Bitch, come say that to My face White Boy! I'll F$*# You till You love Me Faggot."

Such a way with words Mike had lol. (PS: I am quoting Tyson direct so I am not personally using Homophobic terms, just quoting from Tyson direct  who did).  

But despite all this that the public love and swallow up willingly because it's bad or negative behavior, the fact that Iron Mike was actually a true student of the sweet science and actually one of the most skillful boxers, not fighter, when He wanted or needed to be get lost on the majority in favor of "He bit Evanders ears off...."

A small example of Tyson's boxing skill, beginning at 1:55 into the clip. . . .

Speaking of Biting people's ears off, I may turn up States Side one day at a Zodiac convention that I have advanced knowledge is also being attended by Thomas Void. I shall ask Sandy to deliberately bring up 'Welsh Chappie and His recent Xenophon Doc release' or something similar to trigger Void to begin issuing the insults He will no doubt start issuing safe in the false assumption I am an Ocean Away. Then I shall ask the Venue Director to 'Hit it' and the lights will go down, a hooded figure appear, and AC/DC Hells Bells begin and a message over the speaker system announce, in a suspiciously Welsh Accented Voice, "Thomas! Join Me in bowing your head, putting your hands together and. . . Let us play!!"

At this point Void is violently ripping at the exit door handle trying desperately to get out of the room while screaming "HELLLPPPPPP ME"

I can almost see it. . .  T. Void informing Me:

"Touch Me and that's assault and you will be arrested!!"

I'd sarcastically have to reply: "Touching You is not Assault Mr Void. **Right  hand Punch delivered wonderfully to nose of The Voidey Phantom** . . . That's assault Tom!"

Then By time Blue Meanies arrive to awwest Me for issuing a disgraceful, yet fucking excellently landed, right set of knuckles to ugly boy Void, I'll write a letter addressed to the Chronicle:

"This is The Assaulter Speaking. . . I am the destroyer of the nose on Toms face last night. To prove this, I shall tell You something only the police and I know.

Last evening: I threw Only One Right hand, which was successfully delivered. Tom was on the floor, feet to the West. I did not walk away casually so as to not draw attention to Myself, despite what Tom's friend Morf says. I ran away giggling like a 5 year old.

Hey Tommy Void, doesn't it rile you up to have your face rearranged with Noze spread across your ugly face? PS: Cops pulled a goof. As I was running away to the airport this cop car pulled up and asked Me if I had seen any strange Welsh people in the last 5 to 10 minutes and I put on a very bad US accent and told them "Ya'll accusin Me of summin? I ain't no bitch ass Welsh Person moova fucka!" Then I swam back Home across the Ocean never to be seen again!"

ME - Feeling much better now
Thomas Void: Had most unfortunate trouser accident last night.

I will turn up one day, seriously. No screen to hide away behind then, and no keyboard to hit to issue Your insults. It may have to be done in the real, and not virtual, World. Imagine that! Fuck Me i'm petrified already and not having a safe insult place! HELP!

The wife you mentioned was an actress right? I forget her name. Robin something? I remember she is extremely hot but can't remember her last name.

Trouser accidents are always hilarious! That would be a good name for a punk rock band. That or Trouser Stain.

As far as Tyson as a boxer, I would agree with anyone who said he is the greatest of all time. Sure that could be up for debate but my opinion is that he would take down anyone in his prime, even Ali.

Givens. Robin Givens. When She and Mike were estranged but not yet divorced Mike tells a funny story of going to Robin's home one day as they were still sleeping together. So He gets there, Knocks a few times and there's no answer. As He is about to Leave, Mike recalled:

Robin pulls into the driveway and She's not alone! Guess who She's with? Pretty Boy Brad Pitt! So Brad gets out with a swagger and looks up and see's Me and almost collapses and starts going 'It's not what it looks like Mike, we are just friends, We talked about you all the way here. She had lovely things to say about you and ....I....I'm a fan of yours.....Please don't hit Me Mike.... Not in the face, don't touch the face!"

But yeah, Givens just wanted Mikes Money. Mike's Manager said that literally days after marrying Mike Robin and Her Mother phoned Tyson's Manager and said "This is Robin, I am now Mrs Mike Tyson and I am taking control of His Career and management." And that's what She did.

Yeah I would agree that in His prime, around age 19-25 or so,Tyson was almost unbeatable.  Many of Tyson's opponents were intimidated  by Him and basically many of them Opponent's lost before even getting into the ring. The most famous of which was the boxer who was said to be Tyson's toughest test, the rival IBF Heavyweight Champion of the World and Himself undefeated in Michael Spinks (31-0 with 21 KO's). Tyson was the WBA & WBC Heavyweight Champion (34-0 with 31 KO's). Billed as the fight of the Century to Unify the Division and crown The Winner Undisputed Champion. (Holding all legitimate World Titles - WBA, WBC IBF & Ring Magazine Belts)

Michael Spinks came in to the ring first and as He awaited Tysons arrival the look on His face was unmistakable. He looked absolutely terrified at what was about to come out of the other corner at Him. Spinks, as stated above, had not only never lost a pro fight in 31 bouts, but He had never been put on the floor, either. The Biggest Money fight in Boxing History at that time, and Tyson's best opponent who many said would take Tyson deep into the later rounds, Lasted exactly Ninety Seconds. Tyson came out at Spinks like a Freight  train and Spinks looked like a Rabbit in the Headlights. Down within the first minute of round No.1, got back up and when the ref asked was He OK and did He wish to continue Nodded 'Yes' and the ref said 'Box' and Tyson walked over, threw one more right hand and the commentator said: "And He's down again and this time He isn't going to get up. . ."



With Iron Mike, 99% of His opponent's were much taller and a lot of cases, Bigger and heavier. Yet, in a division where size literally is everything, The Heavyweight Division, His reputation preceded Him to the ring and beat many an opponent before the bell went to start the first round.

Tyson best KO Win, the Win that gave Tyson the distinction of being the 'Youngest Ever Heavyweight Champion of the World' at just 19 years of age, was the Title fight against Trevor Berbick. It's also one of the more comical KO's as Berbick get's floored for the final time get's back up and then crashes back to the canvas without Mike throwing a punch as He stumbles and staggers all over the place until His dazed stumbling about gives way to another collapse onto the floor....

I know it's in the realm of the hypothetical, and boxers themselves don't like to be asked would they best So-an-So from a different generation/era of Boxing, but it's natural to compare the best from different era's and ask 'Who wins?'

For example, a 20/21 yr old Mike Tyson v an in prime Ali and I had to bet the House on the fight and winner thereof? I'm putting my House on Iron Mike. If Smoking Joe's big notorious left hook, with the same trademark Left Hook Hammer of Henry Cooper felling Ali, then Tyson would, in My Humble and acknowledged Hypothetical opinion, beat Ali by either a straight KO, or a TKO victory.

It's just simply a shame He got to the stage where He hated boxing and people involved in it but had to keep fighting to pay His millions of dollars owed to the IRS.

It just damages and takes away from The Legacy He could and should have had when His record shows Losses to the likes of Danny Williams and Kevin Mcbride. He basically just gave up against Mcbride and got hit and fell down almost taking a deliberate dive and didn't try and beat the count. Mcbride was so happy in the in ring post fight interview and thanked Mike excitedly for the fight (He knew how impressive it would be to have a W on His record against the Name Mike Tyson). Tyson said in reply in His own in ring interview:

"Congratulations to Kevin, a great fight and great victory but, the true boxing fans know the truth about what is happening, they know this is not really Me in this fight because I just don't wanna do this anymore, I don't wanna do this anymore man! I hate this sport but I have to keep fighting to pay the Government or they'll put Me in prison.

I hate boxing, all anybody has ever done is steal everything they could from me in this sport and the one person who really cared about Me died just before He could see His kid Tyson win The Heavyweight Championship for Him. So Well Done Kevin, you fought a good fight, but like I said, the real fans know what happened here tonight."

One of the baddest dudes of all time but has a pussy little voice...

WelshChappie wrote:It's just simply a shame He got to the stage where He hated boxing and people involved in it but had to keep fighting to pay His millions of dollars owed to the IRS.

It just damages and takes away from The Legacy He could and should have had when His record shows Losses to the likes of Danny Williams and Kevin Mcbride. He basically just gave up against Mcbride and got hit and fell down almost taking a deliberate dive and didn't try and beat the count. Mcbride was so happy in the in ring post fight interview and thanked Mike excitedly for the fight (He knew how impressive it would be to have a W on His record against the Name Mike Tyson). Tyson said in reply in His own in ring interview:

"Congratulations to Kevin, a great fight and great victory but, the true boxing fans know the truth about what is happening, they know this is not really Me in this fight because I just don't wanna do this anymore, I don't wanna do this anymore man! I hate this sport but I have to keep fighting to pay the Government  or they'll put Me in prison.

I hate boxing, all anybody has ever done is steal everything they could from me in this sport and the one person who really cared about Me died just before He could see His kid Tyson win The Heavyweight Championship for Him. So Well Done Kevin, you fought a good fight, but like I said, the real fans know what happened here tonight."

Wasn't he managed by Don King? I think I would get sick of boxing after a while if I had to deal with that thief.

Yes, Don King invited Himself to pick Mike up when He was released from Prison. Tyson had neither asked nor expected Him to be waiting in a limo outside the Prison Gates.

He then put Tyson up in a plush appt. and gave Him a sum of cash, His own car etc, and not because Don King is a good caring Man who is offering Charity either. A short time later He got Tyson to sign for Don King Promotions and Don King announced the news at a press conference where He stood at the microphone waving mini flags of America, go ol' Glory with the Stars and Stripes, and King repeated "Praise the Lord, only in America" which I think must have been missing several words at the end to make it "Paise the Lord, only in America can I legally steal Millions of Dollars from a sporting legend and get away with it."

'Don King Promotions' was His Official Company Title, I believe He may have misused the English language and substituted one Word for another.

'Don King Promotions'. . .

or more accurately:

'Don King Extortions'

yep don king is scum! that was his deal, wine and dine potential clients and show them what the high life is all about and once they sign on that dotted line then boom, he owns them and will get rich off of their hard work.

Eric X wrote:yep don king is scum! that was his deal, wine and dine potential clients and show them what the high life is all about and once they sign on that dotted line then boom, he owns them and will get rich off of their hard work.

Exactly!!

Ali was the first in what would become a laundry list of boxers to sue King over money owed to, or stolen from, themselves. Ali was owed just over 1 Million Dollars by King who sent summoned A mutual friend of His and Ali's to go round to see Ali and give Him 50 Grand in cash and sign to say He accepts it as full payment and gave specific warning not to hand over a dollar if Ali hasn't signed the document. Ali, His health failing and probably could do without the stress of a Courtroom showdown, accepted and signed.

Then, seeing King back down and at least offer Fifty Grand to settle out of Court with Ali, other less famous & beloved boxers tried what Legend and Icon Ali did and sue King themselves. They underestimated King and His greed and sadly, for them anyway, they were not Boxers who were International Superstars loved by the people the World over and transcended Boxing becoming bigger than the sport itself. To Them after Ali, the response was not the same by King!

After one former boxer who was under Contract with Don King Promotions who, like Ali, was A Former Heavyweight Champion of the World but far less popular than Ali had filed a suit against Him, the boxer spoke about the response He got from King. He said it was in the form of a visit from a fairly well known Mafia Hitman who warned the fighter that if He proceeds with His case against Don King, the Two Million dollars He is claiming is owed Him won't be of any interest to Him as He won't be alive to know about it. The boxer subsequently dropped His case and claim against King.

Didn't Don King die a while back or am I thinking of Rodney King?

And who the fuck thought it was a good idea to give Don King a rocket launcher?



EDIT: Nope, I guess it was Rodney King that died, but Don probably doesn't have much time left... he's 85 years old now.

Don King's punishment for ripping off Ali should have been that he had to fight Ali in a nationally televised event. That probably would have made him think twice about stealing from anyone else.

Dang, just read this as well...

"King has been charged with killing two people in incidents 13 years apart. In 1954, King shot a man in the back after spotting him trying to rob one of King's gambling houses; this incident was ruled a justifiable homicide. In 1967, King was convicted of nonnegligent manslaughter for stomping one of his employees to death. For this he served three years and eleven months in prison. After being released, he was later pardoned in 1983."

And here is a quote about King by Mike Tyson himself:

""(King is) a wretched, slimy, reptilian motherfucker. This is supposed to be my 'black brother', right? He's just a bad man, a real bad man. He would kill his own mother for a dollar. He's ruthless, he's deplorable, he's greedy ... and he doesn't know how to love anybody."

Tyson Slugged King in the ribs at ringside one time after shooting a promo video and knocked King clean off His seat. I watched it the other day lol.

Here is that clip. I don't think Tyson meant to hit King off the chair and it looks like He just didn't recognise His own strength. Then again, maybe He did it on purpose...

Fast Forward to 4:40...

lol awesome. I knew king was a piece of shit but I just did some reading on him and he is even worse than I thought he was

Eric X wrote:lol awesome. I knew king was a piece of shit but I just did some reading on him and he is even worse than I thought he was

He was a convicted murderer. Although the charge was reduced to Manslaughter and King only served several years prison, the fact is He kicked a man to death who owed Him a few hundred dollars.

To prove First degree murder, the State has to show and prove premeditation. Second Degree murder, The State has to show that while there may have been no pre-though or pre-planning to murder another, they need to show that the intent was to kill in the act itself.

King was witnessed kicking the man repeatedly in the head while He was on the ground causing the man to fall into a coma and subsequently die from the injuries. Technically it's almost impossible to prove what King's motive was whether it was to simply severely damage or kill. So He was charged with, and convicted of, Manslaughter in the First Degree and spent a total of just shy of 4 years in prison.

PS: Seen the latest news? Don King is going to rub it right in the victims family faces by having the street where the murder took placed renamed: 'Don King Way'.... Press reporting of this link below:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3793014/Don-King-street-stomped-man-death-named-him.html